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TEDx Talks
Published: 2017-09-13
Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fs1nQ3G_0_0
hello and welcome so it's a good decision to come through topics so talk about decisions you may not be aware of it but to make hundreds of them every day should I take my umbrella with me today what to have for breakfast which line I take to come to book you think of it so then if Tom told them that you make but you don't pay
much attention now these decisions are some that's easy because their personal and people's opinion will not matter that much but what about bullets times that you'll have to decide something and it's limited to action that you would make in front of others so things get complicated at this point let me ask a question how many of you would change their behavior in public just based on
that expert person over others like true they do this in this way or say it in that way how many okay another a simpler question if you're talking to someone do you set some expectations based on the other side gender age type of work yeah I think most of us do this this is mainly because of social norms dominates on society this man's or expectations that
forms of to do something in a certain way that's specific situations so talking about this things get more complicated when it affects our lives so we have a lot of rules and norms in our society that would affect us either abandoned or in Benedict way and people some people with temple formal or try to force themselves to fit inside the mall just because they're afraid of
being judged but have we quit sending those moments before like who set them up when did they become homes at the first place I think all we know about loans but they are the most fearsome enemies off us as more than individuals so spend that then he's a writer he wrote the book at that I would really highly recommend you to check it out in that
book it's called origins of everyday things he could live in that book around five hundreds things that's we do or say in our everyday life from different cultures eastern western Middle East that's one thing can find that the most important point that sort some loans from different societies more money or basically share for main qualities one they tell us what to do and what not to
do second there's still should be shared in other words people have been general awareness about that more third big can carry an element of control people can feel afraid they can feel guilty if the loan is not total Sarah this man's can actually influence our behavior so high and so deep to understand this research shows research groups from UCLA and then diversity of ideas on the
they designed the frame work new science framework to understand this so the design than experimental social experiment and the combined that social experiment the results together with the brain imaging data and they Templeton crews and the number one or the most influential Frank took on all of this isn't %HESITATION is the effect of moans they also Corbett as the great expectations so at any situations that
is our tuition we have no money to the elections co exist at the same time what society expects us to say what to do and what we feel in our hearts of course sometimes these people don't accept him be the same and we feel happy about that but what about other times when we have to choose won the election of the two bulls hard decisions truly
define who we are I've been living in several different societies open closed religious liberal East West and Middle East I could see them real huge effect and polo clones on the society that's one need to stop and look at it have a closer look to understand it let me give you some examples back in the Middle East you're trying people tend to follow the norms even
if it contradicts with their own beliefs if even if it's because I think with that illusion for him as a society that powerful in some ibises societies I think you can relate to this you would find people stay up for a free cell working times just because it's a social norm that is normal that is no other power can because these phenomena and throughout history we
find that social norms and expectations put enormous producer on women yes we are in the twenty first century yet in several societies around the globe you can find the women still facing discrimination and hardships to get them put put XS for education or work however took about norms is not always negative like something being norm but it's not necessarily mean that it's a bad thing even
in the train and I give my seat to an elder person to a pregnant woman it's a social norm but it's a good one so no one's on that always bad but the core point that the deeply affect us and they can't change maze of the citizens in our life like how to treat people which career path that we take whom and when to muddy so
we must step before taking a decision and think about the reason why we are doing this the good news is it's like any physical disease social diseases as well can be cured just with the right medicine that the level so fell below me is physically and all of a bitter that means that this would be a one minute that meant ignoring them or in Japanese which
is sort of so without the land we will try to go back home all of Maine tackle fly hello own let others what society when there is an American philosopher once said when we change our way of looking at something this something with change so whatever is the opinion of the society whatever is the more we have first to process it as a point of view
not to take it and accept it and let it change our life without understand let me give you some examples about those social norms and if we apply it up on the home what will happen successful person will not be just the engineer the doctor the lawyer social expectations no such cysts will be we are going what we truly love what else when we apply what
what else can happen when the up later but the home we will start feeling insecure about our bodies our faces the way we talk the way we express ourselves what will happen to me up like a but the whole we even know the real meaning and a member of the real value of getting married and building a family that's many societies that I have tried so
that I have lived there you can see people are spending huge a month like that or lifespan and if Forbes online most of that will not help or improve the life of the words what will happen when we apply the below it would be okay to quit your job it would be very okay to restart from the beginning you will still consider this as waste of
time no Lebanon would be that in mind that it would remind us that that is another chance we can take it would remind us that the real waste of life the whole life would it be possible in in the wrong direction because it's only only when we know that isn't behind what we are going then we can go and enjoy our lives and the method is
