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TEDx Talks
Published: 2016-06-10
Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vlpKyLklDDY
good afternoon today you want to my leadership and when I was discussing this with a friend of mine he was asking leadership in utopia what we need leadership in utopia isn't utopia finally the place in the moment where we can get rid of all of these leaders in the fridge well I don't know I think in the utopia that will be humans hopefully and if they're
humans they will hopefully still be social beings as and whenever there are social beings they come together as well inform it's groups sometimes organizations and when they all these organizations then I think the words of Peter Drucker to only three things happen naturally an organization friction confusion and on the performance therefore you don't need anything but everything else a quiet leaders so I do think also
in utopia we should look at the leaders the question is kind of neat should we look at the hero model of leadership where shining star is the ideal person I don't know today want to explore with you a different kind and for this I wanted to do a little thought think about the best leader you have here she say now all of you will have experience
other people but I would do it I say I don't think you will have things like well you know the way that person yelled at me in the morning that was that was that was just brilliant away and I wanted always have will probably not probably the person one of them I want to explore now I do think leadership is an interesting thing that's happened it's
over glorified but whenever you you become a leader and I have the chance to eat small teams large organizations nonprofit profit organizations whenever you become a leader you have like a rendezvous with reality leadership is a bit like parenting I'd give all these visions and ideas what you will do and then you're in the moment and then what I would call the leadership problem formula kicks
and probably the people you've thought about just a second ago have massive this what is the formula don't like every leader when every of you has ever been in the leadership position might have faced the challenges I think every leader faces the leadership program formula on that ghost teal tee times people times power first one is GOP which for me stands for too little time there's
just not enough time to do things and you can't pass around or somebody will take care of it no it's you and then you need to do something and what many people then fall back and is what we call the headless chickens and they run around and tell them how you do that you know that you know that you do that and that might not be
the thank comes as well people all he does have to do with people and for me the most reminded of my very first official leadership position more than ten years ago so I would have my first direct reports and the first Iraqi board was coming into the room and I had all lined up I had the vision at the team spirit had a story to tell
basically and that was a very assertive young gentleman who came to mean that lost I thought nice I have a question for actually I started the email policy if a company and you know I have a motto I live by and I always include this and have this for the past five years are always include this in my email signature can I do this as well
in this company and there was with all my stories and with all my vision and so on was like what's is that what leadership is all about that was the starting the manuals for two hours and phone finally movies that okay yeah let's go ahead with this but everybody was ever lead was see like that's not always about the glories in China things but all about
the little things little discussion that we have the last element is power it's an interesting is a very interesting study done university of Berkeley ninety eight they brought in random students and selected them randomly in groups of three and from these groups of three two of them had to do to our assignment and one of them was randomly assigned to be the supervisor and then a
social science experiments goes that was a special twist to it at how often our the researchers then brought in cookies and of course it was videotaped and then they observed what happens actually that hung from a part of this sure enough the people who were randomly assigned to be supervises significantly more of the cookies but not only this that she left significantly more the bread crumbs
as well on the table like I am blessed to coach and was very vision measure and other shows after thirty minutes of random state to high status power think something with innocent humans and I think in some we need to take now I do think these of the Catholic leadership problems that are not very often take care of but I think in a utopia we need
to address those so how do we do that what is the way out for this one I think we need to travel back in time she almost eighteen nineteen hundred years to Rome to pursue called Marcus arrayed now some of you might know Marcus our radios markets a radius is one of the pre dominant figures of the still weak school of philosophy still wakes like the
Zen of the west but market rate is interesting for leadership because he was running a little like you know little side business office on the site yet either side job in moonlighting he was and that's on the statue he's also you see in there on a horse as well he was at the time as well on top of being a philosophy that he had the side
job of being the emperor of Rome at the time and the historian William Irvine called him actually the chew beacon often liked it leadership he was supposed to be one of the last night of the five good kings of Rome now Marcus araneus what we know of him set things like this the happiness of your life depends on the quality of your fellow he said so
I'd virtues use your time well and be cheerful and when you draw from life to apply now can you imagine these words being upset by some of the leaders like trump and so on today most likely not really what did he do and we know a couple of things that were turned I think that is sign for utopia leadership he was focusing a lot of his
time on fuel Twichell call self leading oneself first for going out and leading products and I think that's in my leadership challenges helped me enormously actually face some of the challenges of the leadership core on the formula that shift if you the fun of either dehart once said if you want to lead invested least forty percent of your time in letting yourself first for you go
autonomous now how do you do that and what I want to share with you a couple of strategies that have tested that I've worked with and so on to read it try to see what can we do with that yourself first strategy in the first few of self leadership as outliers self where when you become a leader actually some of the crucial things to be self
aware of yourself but it's getting more and more difficult any of you have ever been a leadership in a leadership position if you've ever asked trying to ask for feedback that's not so easy on the athletic team hay group to have some feedback very often what you count as the silence I can these engine western movies and has just bought a come on some feedback ya
brilliant and you know how that's not right for that I mean you're you're signing there though the paycheck basically there are brilliant now their sins ways on all fours to learn tassel to for benefit one of the things I think every leader can selves and one of the tools that have call character traits character traits check you can do that on a rainy Sunday and do
the following ask yourself for example what was the worst leader that you have a hat and then think what your face does them with this this is me reflecting upon this and then go further and affect what did he or she do you actually did he yell what to chio would you can maybe withhold information when I was doing this exercise was like love that badly
that withholding information and here comes another trick on this tool give yourself a score from one to five for yourself how good are you for example sharing a withholding information how bad are you at this point and for me that was like well I'm actually not very good at this so what is my plan to move that up to become very it's one because we but
we find bad in others very often resonates off without self one of the key things to do from time to time but if you do that you will see out of the way portrayed affect you do that the next morning you fully engaged but then like one of these trails at the beginning it's very shop at night on a coast fades away and that's why what
you can do is a strategy that Marcus a radius did everyday and that is self reflection taking just a couple of minutes during the day and thinking about the challenges that you have chafed but also that you are maybe about a half during the day Marcus radios was famous for doing that in the night for me this five minute reflection sometimes and in the evening sometimes
off in the morning going to package John having a quick coffee and then just opening my black book and just asking couple one of the challenges that I'm about to say how that money should go less today how would lead I would like to be do I faced the challenges that I'm about to face today then asking this and putting his answer in just one or
two minutes of those secular interesting studies university of California just wanted to many minutes of those and help raise your compassion level the fathers and maybe beat the cookie problem that we talk about easier as early as well before self reflection two to five minutes and then we come to the last one and that is self regulation you know you've done your awareness you done your
reflection but you still will encounter the moments you will still encounter the meeting league the discussions that you have where people come in who've promised to yes I will do everything I will have everything ready and they come in the room and say and let's talk like let's look what but the report you said was ready oh oh sorry and all the other things the people
who challenge you think they should be on your side and you should be on the other side and so on and all these moments with you that you will face of leader when these moments you think there are stop doing this do what I told you now this is of course not the best leadership how do we do best do that self regulation and one tool
that has helped me enormously what's called refrain re framing simple tool way finger we have this crew was coming up like Arab I want you to know stop nurses have wanted to seconds well on a scale from one to ten how important is that issue right now with ten being really my life goals so to speak where is that if it's a ten well then you
better engage really forty and that's but maybe very often it's more like a two three at reframing that taking a step back and enormously she addressing small strategy small things but what I would encourage you to do think about this when you have a leadership position invest this time itself when a self reflection self regulation and self leadership in general before you go out and lead
others because very often we hear about leadership like people want to lead others want to do everything why not stay first leading yourself I think we all did this this will lead to leadership utopia and we can strike and I think we can start off by doing now and hopefully if you're starting now and somebody asked in ten twenty years maybe no utopia the question who
